Oh, my.

They weren’t kidding.

These are dirty. 

So, here’s the thing: I have no objection to dirty. And it is indeed the case that if you go the traditional language-learning route—classes and books—you will not usually learn the saltier/earthier (love those words!) terms and expressions.

Warning: Readers with delicate sensibilities might want to skip the remainder of this review, because it’s about to go graphic.

“If you’re looking for a grammar lesson, you’re in the wrong spot,” the publisher, Ulysses Press, tells you up front. “But if you want to learn the vocab to tell your friend that he has a tiny dick or to get rid of the douchebag hitting on you in the bar, then study up.”

These Dirty Spanish Flashcards manage to turn even the lowest-key of off-color words extra explicit. The example for chavo (meaning “dude”) is: “¡Calma, chavo! Es un chorrito de orina nomás.” (Chill out, dude! It’s just a dribble of urine.”) 

Yeah, I know. I’m not super-clear either on what context would require that one.

“I love using a dildo” is “Me encanta usar un consolador.” On that card is a drawing of a scantily clad woman wearing a strapon and a guy wearing nothing but underwear and an alarmed expression.

The following might come in handy, should the situation call for it: “¡Tienes la verga más grande que he visto!” (“You have the biggest cock I’ve ever seen!”)

By the way, on one card there is a very useful discussion of how to say “to fuck,” involving geographic variations that might come in handy for itinerant lotharios.

I am going to guess I am not the target demographic for these cards. For instance, I don’t say things like “bitchslap” or “preggers,” even in English. I found some of the sample sentences not just dirty, but also mean-spirited and vulgar, and occasionally misogynistic. 

But I think the content won’t necessarily read the same way to people of a certain (other) age, and this could be a great gift for maybe college-age kids who aren’t easily offended and who like talking in direct (rude?) ways about sex, drugs, and bodily functions.

There aren’t all that many cards in the box—about 100—so just don’t expect the user of this product to be prepared for every dirty situation he or she might encounter. 

Despite my mild criticisms, I respect a publisher that sets a goal and goes for it. And this product does fill a need!